I am a sleep in till crazy hours (thanks Adam), don't do breakfast, "let's stay in pj’s till 2 p.m." kind of mom. But then when we go out and everyone better look top notch….. Or as close to.
I am a disorganized but everything needs to be on a schedule and planned out or else I lose my brain kind of mom.
I am a "lets just snack for lunch" kind of mom.
I am an unadventurous kind of mom. I have an overactive brain that can picture every horrible quite honestly unlikely possibility way the situation could end up and I allow it to keep myself and my kids from going out and trying a lot of new things. But I am a mom who does offer many SAFE opportunities where we can learn and play together. And on occasion I am the mom who will turn a blind eye so that Daddy can do the more adventurous “I’m not so sure that’s a good idea” kind of activities.
I am a “lets get out and get dirty” but silently watches every stain that won't come out kind of mom.
I am a loses her temper just about everyday, raises my voice, overreacts, kind of mom; but I am also a get down to your level and ask for forgiveness, admit my weaknesses, ask for help, and a turn to my children for joy in my lowest times kind of mom. (Golly I just love those kids so much!)
My kids don't have a huge variety of toys, nor are they allowed screen time on tablets or phones, and we don't own a TV. But they are the best at self entertaining, imagination play, quiet time activities, and reading every book in the kids cupboard in under 10 minutes.
I am a crafty DIY, artsy kind of person (only when I can find inspiration on Pinterest…. No original creativity here), I could do it all day; but when it comes to crafting with my kiddos we stick to crayons and stickers because my clean freak mom brain can't handle the mess or chaos.
I am a wiz in the kitchen at dinner time, spend 2 hours cooking only to have my girls turn their noses up to it and #OBoy eat half then throw the rest on the floor kind of mom. I’m also a clean freak at every point of the day, except for after dinner, that’s just a mess I’d rather let sit there awhile before I tackle it kind of mom.
I am a strict “if you don't eat your dinner then that's it for the rest of the night" kind of mom.
I am also a "lets break out all the hidden treats and goodies after the kids go to bed" kind of mom.
I am a “feels too deeply” helicopter mom. I just can't stand missing out on any precious moment with my kiddos, so you won't see me going out for me time, girls nights or even dates with my sweet hubby all that often. When my kids are sad or feeling embarrassed my heart breaks and I can't help but cry alongside of them, and when they are proud and happy I can't help but smile ear to ear through my happy tears, and when they run up and give me sporadic hugs throughout the day I can't help but squeeze just a little too hard. (At the same time I am the kind of who tells my kids “I’m sorry you fell and scraped up your knee, but you’ll be OK.")
My sweet kiddos are always welcome in bed with us. Just so long as they sleep on dad’s side of the bed (this mama likes her sleep).
I am a "strict at bedtime so I can have quiet me time (no in reality it’s more like quiet cleaning time)" kind of mom. Most nights my kids are up hours after we put them to bed and I have to go in to quiet them down more times than I care to count. On my bad days I lose my patience and and raise my voice. But on my good days, or when I allow myself to be humbled after I have just overreacted, I am the mom who will go in and snuggle each of my kids one by one (I’ve even climbed in the crib on occasion) to sing primary songs and hymns till my voice is so hoarse I can’t sing any longer.
I am not the right mom for everyone-- but I am the perfect mom for my babies.
I am not perfect, I have no clue what I’m doing and frankly most days I feel way over my head. I doubt myself on the daily and my brain looks for every opportunity to tear the way I am a mom down. I keep things bottled up for fear that I’ll let the world around me see the raw and real me, but then inevitably it always comes out when I’ve kept things inside for too long (and it’s usually not pretty and always at the wrong time). I’ve spent many days feeling trapped by my depression, so much so that I can't find the strength to get out of bed. But even at my darkest moments (and I have had MANY) I can look back, or with the help of my loving husband see that I still had shining moments as a mom. I use my weaknesses to teach my kids that having faults is normal, that feeling is OK, all emotions are OK. I hold my kids closer and allow their bad morning breath, slobbery kisses and chunky little arms around my neck help me feel joy on the days I can't find my own strength.
I am a person, trying everyday to be my best self, and my best self will always be a mom.
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