Here is a ten minute snippet from my day.
I put #ClaraBelle down for a nap, and she is just not falling asleep (come on baby girl, I know you are so tired.). So I go in to give her another bottle of milk and some books, only to find that she has had a massive blowout and there is poop all over the sheet. So I pick her up and start cleaning her up. But she has a rash (due to antibiotics she is on for an ear infection), and I get that her little bum is sore (I really do sweetheart) but she starts freaking out because she doesn't want me to wipe down there. So she is getting poop all over herself, the changing table, the wall and myself. It’s a battle and I didn't handle things as well as I should have but eventually all was cleaned up and she was back in a clean bed snuggled up with a bottle of milk. As I’m shutting her door #OBoy starts crying because he is hungry. But before I can even get to him I see a giant wet spot on my couch and #LivyLu announces “I’m all wet mommy.” Massive poopy blowout. So I clean her up and then have to climb halfway into my cleaning cupboard to find the cleaner, then proceed to scrub down the couch. Finally I can make a bottle for #OBoy. I pick him up only to find that he and his bassinet are soaked. (Long sigh and head thrown back, close eyes and ask myself over and over again “Why? Why? Why?”) So I strip down his bed, quickly toss all poopy sheets into washer (oh before I do this I have to dump the 3 loads of laundry I had shoved in the dryer from the day before because I didn’t want to fold it, and being out where I could see it would make me feel guilty). Then I change #OBoy, and what I think is just a leaking diaper is a blowout. (Again, throws head back with a long sigh.) Get him cleaned up, discover that the pants I pulled out for him are too small (WHAT??? He was just born yesterday, how is he outgrowing 0-3 mo???). This whole time his cry is getting louder and louder because he just wants the bottle that is sitting right next to him. Finally I sit down with him and start to feed him, but of course he doesn't start eating before letting out a very angry grunt.
I am so grateful that days like today will fade away and only the good memories will stay.
Like this morning when #ClaraBelle was laughing and playing with me as I got her ready for the day.
When #LivyLu told me she hurt her finger and told me she needed to go to the doctors. I told her we couldn't go to the doctors, and then she cut me off and said “Well then you be the doctor mommy.” So we checked to see if her body parts were working. We blinked our eyes, gave kisses, hugs, jumped, wiggled toes and she laughed and laughed and laughed.
I had just finished feeding #OBoy and was readjusting my hand and he reached forward and grabbed my finger and held on tight.
When #LivyLu was bored this afternoon, I pulled out some animals and blocks. She built a zoo for all the animals. She fed the animals, took them for walks and even fanned the air when the tiger tooted (she came up with that one all on her own).
#OBoy was laying on a blanket in the living room when I was doing the dishes. He started to fuss and I went over to check on him. As I stood over him he smiled.
#ClaraBelle dumped out the living room toy box and #LivyLu ran over. She grabbed #ClaraBelle’s hand and then went around the living room picking up the toys with her. They were laughing the whole time.
Tonight our bedtime routine was a little different because Adam had to work late. #ClaraBelle and #LivyLu layed in #LivyLu’s bed laughing and having fun while I read them books waiting for Adam to come home. The whole time, #OBoy, who was also in the room, was cooing.
Ask Adam or any of my sisters (who I texted the whole poop fiasco to), I wanted today to end so much. It was hard from the second I opened my eyes. And while it would have been nice to just skip all the hard things, I wouldn't completely wish away days like today, because today was still a good day. The little gems of my day were exactly that, little, and to some people they could have been easily looked over; but they are the reasons for my smile today.
There is a beautiful song “Glorious” and the lyrics go as follow:
There are times when
You might feel aimless
And can't see the places
Where you belong
But you will find that
There is a purpose
It's been there within you
All along
And when you're near it
You can almost hear it
[Chorus:]
It's like a symphony
Just keep listening
And pretty soon you'll start
To figure out your part
Everyone plays a piece
And there are melodies
In each one of us
Oohhh it's glorious
Today was GLORIOUS because I struggled, I cried, I reacted poorly but I also asked for forgiveness (I love how children are so quick to forgive, it is my goal to be more like my daughters). I laughed, I smiled and I came out of a long day of mothering excited for more days like today. There truly is nothing better than the joy that comes through motherhood.
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